“Crap,” I think.

I am smack in the middle of teaching a 7 week chakra series. I’m also having a fight with one of my best friends, feeling all bitch-on-wheelsy, and not super into getting out of bed. Oh, and what topic am I scheduled to teach on in yoga class this morning?  The heart chakra, of course.

Fucking perfect.

Less than inspired, I use one finger to google, “fourth chakra yoga.” Search results include:  blah, blah, blah, LOVE, blah, blah, blah UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, blah, blah, blah, LISTEN TO YOUR HEART, blah, blah, blah, HEART OPENERS, blah, blah, blah TURN INSIDE, blah, blah, blah, BACKBENDS, blah, blah, blah, OPEN YOUR HEART.”

I so do not feel like doing this.

Hearts are funny. Where emotions are concerned, science emphasizes brain activity and hormonal response. So how the heck did the heart come to be the seat of emotion, anyway? It’s right up there with classic questions like, “Why is the sky blue?” I mean, it sure feels like we feel with our heart, doesn’t it? Anyone who’s ever broken one can attest.

In the circles I run in there’s a lot of New Agey talk about LOVE and THE HEART. Hearts are supposed to be OPEN not CLOSED! So, if your heart isn’t adequately opened you’ve got yourself a problem. BAD, BAD, CLOSED HEART!

Hey, I know! Why not just do some handstands, sing some kirtan chants, and meditate on LOVE  like the latest guru-guy says? He knows what he’s talking about. After all–he’s wearing a John Lennon T-shirt. (Oh, and if you think it’s creepy that he asks for your phone number after class just go ‘head and open your heart some more.)

But I’ve got a class to teach, and it doesn’t look like I’m going to google my way to inspiration. Instead, I lie down on my yoga mat. I close my eyes and place both hands on my chest.

I do not try to open my heart.

I just breathe into it. Sort of.

It’s pure knot today. I feel around for a free end to loosen with my breath but do not find one.

A heart–a genuine heart–is a bloody sort of a thing. It’s all subterranean gristle and muscle and vein.

Here’s what I think:  I think we move rhythmically. I think sometimes hearts are more open and sometimes more closed. I think that’s how hearts are designed. I think the relentless pursuit of an ever-opening heart is a bad idea–a shame-inducing scam. Beware of those who tell you to open your heart; they all too often have an agenda of their own.

Sometimes a heart is oh so quiet and hard to hear. Sometimes it roars. Sometimes it is ravenous–a hungry ghost. Then, unexpectedly, it is sated. Sometimes a heart churns with venom; sometimes with nectar.

9:15am. Time to go. I am not going to open my heart this morning.

That’s okay–I would prefer to simply make peace with the gristly thing anyway. I curl to the side, gather up my car keys, and head out the door.

 

 

 

 

 

As a yoga teacher/ writer/ life coach, I primarily work alone. Sure, I have accomplished and talented colleagues at the excellent yoga studios that employ me. Sure, I often collaborate professionally with brilliant friends. Yup, I meet one-on-one with students and clients, and sometimes get to travel to fun places. Still–most of the work hours I log are solo. This is true for most of my colleagues as well.

We all know the internet has created opportunity and changed the way many of us work. We can reach more people from our own home office. (Or just from a cushy chair, in my case.)

Yoga teachers probably do the majority of our work in solitude. We plan programs and workshops. We write (hopefully) catchy titles and course descriptions for those programs. We perpetually tweak our bios. We create content, handouts,articles and blog posts. We update our websites. We promote our events through newsletters and social media. We schedule events in distant places, and books flights there. We maintain boatloads of correspondence.

(Or if we’re lucky we have an assistant who does those things for us–an assistant who probably works in solitude.)

What may on the surface appear to be an insouciant lifestyle actually requires buckets of discipline. There is no boss of you making sure things done on time–or at all. If we don’t do what is required to take care of our business then it simply does not get done. Should we decide to take to the couch and watch the entire DVD collector’s edition of Buffy the Vampire Slayer  (otherwise known as The-Greatest-Television-Show-of-All-Time-Ever) during work hours instead of writing  our opus, well–nobody is going to fire us. But the mortgage might be late that month.

To succeed as any kind of solopreneur it is essential to be a good self-motivator, to have the ability to break a big project down into bite size chunks and stay with it over time, and to exercise follow through to the finish line. We must be able to be accountable to ourselves. We must to be able to trust our ability to get the job done. Oh–and we need impeccable organizational skills, and the temperament to actually enjoy a goodly amount of solitude too.

Otherwise, why not just go get a 9-5 job complete with medical benefits and  401k? No shame in that.

OR–we can decide to actually acquire these skills. Lord knows I didn’t have them when I first started down this path. (Except for generally preferring trees to crowds; I come by the introversion trait naturally.) In my work as a life coach, I am regularly amazed at how precious little often stands in the way of success. Things that are actually pretty doable often seem insurmountable. Often, the biggest obstacles are bad habits or unhealthy narratives that we have bought into.

For example, we may struggle with self-worth. We may not know how to get started. We may be intimidated by technology. We may have all kinds of preconceptions about the things we need to do before doing the thing we really want, or need, to do. We may tell ourselves that we need to clean the house, lose ten pounds, get the nose job, get gorgeous professional photos taken, write the perfect bio, learn how to stick a headstand in the middle of the room, and spend more time with the kids before creating a professional website. Who wouldn’t feel crushed under the weight of all that?

I’ve been there. I sucked at this stuff before getting good at it, and through my coaching work have come to realize that a lot of other folks–a lot!–suck at it too. The good news is that accountability is a very acquirable skill. Jessica Boylston-Fagonde and I have put our heads together to create Check IN (not out), a program to cultivate community and accountability for the ever growing population of people who have a lot to do, and who need some help creating structure around it. Basically, it’s the program I wish I could have taken myself some years ago.

You decide what you’re working on each month. (We’ll give you tools to help figure that out.) It may be a professional project; it may be a personal one. You’ll get a monthly one-hour group call to help you field questions, bounce ideas off of, share resources, keep you inspired, keep you motivated–and most of all keep you accountable.

Accountability is the key. (When I need to create accountability in order to finish a grueling, long-term project I am willing to invest in myself and pay for it.)

This program is not just for yoga teachers although many in the yoga community thrive with this kind of work. (I know I did.) Jess and I really cared about making it affordable. We want people to get the support they need so we priced it low–each monthly call costs the equivalent of taking a single yoga class.

We’re excited. We hope you’re excited too–because your potential is exciting.

The first step is to register HERE.

Most people think of yoga as the bendy, stretchy stuff that happens on a yoga mat. Or perhaps yoga brings images of tofu, vegetarians, a hermit seated for meditation–in the perfect lotus position, naturally–atop some remote mountain peak.  Or maybe it makes us think of Madonna’s biceps.

But I love the myths of yoga best. After all, who doesn’t love a good story? “Stories are the creative conversion of life itself into a more powerful, clearer, more meaningful experience. They are the currency of human contact,” says Robert McKee. Isn’t that why novels, television shows and movies reign supreme as modern forms of entertainment? Humans are narrative beings.

So it’s no surprise that in the yoga traditions the wisdom of the ages is handed down through myths. Heroes and heroines, gods and goddesses–teach us truths not in the form of literal facts but as deliberate lies that begin, “Once upon a time…” 

In mythic consciousness–which we enter every time we tell or are told a story–each character or deity represents some aspect of humanity, nature, or the world in which we live. Every character acts as a shard of broken mirror–offering up a very particular glimpse of a very particular truth.

The stories of the gods and goddesses, and heroes and heroines, touch us on a primal level. Their stories are our own stories–and they are chock full o’ practical life tools. If we learn  how to decode them, yoga stories become instruction manuals for living.

When life gets crazy–which it seems to do more often than not–I often find myself asking, “What would my favorite heroine do if she were in this situation?” Over the years, the legendary champions of yoga have inspired me to be courageous when I’m scared, to navigate challenging situations with greater awareness and skill, and to learn how to draw upon my own intrinsic, renewable resources.

In addition to their many educational aspects, though–stories are just plain fun.

Come get your story on. On May 4th-5th, world renowned scholar, and yogi, Douglas Brooks will visit Elements Yoga & Wellness Center. He will tell stories of three goddesses who are aren’t just fundamental to an understanding of yoga–but to our very understanding of life. Join us for a weekend that combines bendy, stretchy yoga with the stories of yoga. Register here.